Creating a Successful System for Love
Today, I would like to offer a guest post on marriage by Karinna Kittles-Karsten, founder of Sacred Love, Inc. Based in Los Angeles, CA, Karinna, an internationally recognized relationship expert and the Love Educator, is the author of the best-selling book Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love, and the popular Sacred Lovemaking DVD. She has also achieved career success as an international model and actress. Karinna’s unique Eastern and Western approach to love, sex and intimacy based on almost 20 years of study of the intimacy wisdom of ancient China, western psychology, and mythology has helped thousands of singles and couples across the World.
I hope you will enjoy this post and get inspired for your marriage life.
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By Karinna Kittles-Karsten
I want to encourage you to do something that helps me achieve incredible success in my own life and in supporting the people that I coach. And that is to put into place a well designed system in the area or areas of love and relationship that you would love to create more success.For instance, if you want to create more loving, clear, supportive communication with a loved one you would put into place a system by which you can check in to see if you and your partner are on the right track.
Let’s say you set up a new communication system with your lover that you both agree upon looks like this:
1. You need to communicate something important.
2. You ask your partner when would be a good time to talk about this important issue. She/He lets you know a time. You have a date for communication– either that moment, or later that day.
3. You communicate in a loving, honoring, and honest way expressing how you feel rather than placing blame towards your partner.
4. Your partner listens with receptivity.
5. You then listen to how your partner feels in a receptive manner.
6. From your conversation you create a new system that can honor your differences as well as support the health of your relationship, such as an agreement to give each other a loving kiss, hug and/or loving words prior to going to sleep instead of what’s been frustrating you and then going to bed in two different worlds.
More often than not the areas where we experience the most frustration, whether it be in communication or qualified dating possibilities, is where there are all kinds of unconscious cobwebs that have not been clearly looked at, resolved, and cleaned out. After doing this you can become more internally organized which reflects externally for health and love to flow.
I have too often heard from people that they want to meet a wonderful partner who they can enjoy spending their life with, but that same person does everything contrary to what a qualified partner would actually look for in a mate. Things like dating many men or women at one time, needing the attention of other women or men than the person you are out on a date with, being dishonest about your age, financial status, or background. A qualified partner can detect these behaviors as an unsound relationship investment and turn and run in the opposite direction.
To create a new successful dating system:
1. Recognize what you really want in a partner.
2. Put your relationship past to rest by clearing up your old emotions.
3. Don’t go out with everyone who asks. Be discerning about which dates will bring you health, energy and joy.
4. Be positive, honest, and self-confident all the time. You will be impressed by how many people will start to ask if they can set you up with a “wonderful person.”
Systems work for creating successful relationships. Make them help you create the great relationship you desire.
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About the Author:
Karinna Kittles-Karsten, The Love Educator, is an internationally recognized relationship expert, speaker, and founder of Sacred Love, Inc. She’s the author of the best-selling book Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love, and the popular Sacred Lovemaking DVD. Her unique Eastern and Western approach to intimacy has helped people transform their love lives across the world. Karinna has been featured in countless national and international TV, radio, internet, and magazine interviews including on NBC’s Starting Over and on the pages of Self magazine. Her website is www.sacredlove.com.
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February 26th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
Good post! Yes, communication is very important for marriage/relationship, I know. One must know how to communicate well with his/her loved one in order to keep a happy loving relationship for life.
February 27th, 2008 at 2:10 am
These are insightful techniques that we should practice in all of our relationships. Imagine how much less anger there would be in the world if we did.